Today is the Hebrew month of Adar, the happiest month of the Jewish year. Judaism places great value on happiness. This year we have been hit hard. That's why we need to make a conscious effort to live with a higher level of happiness.
Happiness begins at home. Here are seven ways to raise happier children.
1. It's okay to not be perfect.
Adults often strive for the unattainable goal of being the perfect parent. This is often an underlying unconscious reason why a person is unhappy. Aim to be good enough, not perfect.
Additionally, God brought you and your child together for a good reason. You are the special parent your child needs. And in the same way, your children are necessary to you.
Miriam Adahan, in her book Raise caring children To tell, “God has given us these special children with unique weaknesses and strengths. Each is given to us only so that we can help him in his work. Not. Chick-kun (Spiritual restoration work) But may he also cooperate with us. Each child challenges us in their own way, but by loving them when we feel the least loved, or when they are the least loved, we bring our greatest spiritual strength. You can make progress. ”
If you let go of unrealistic expectations and accept your and your child's imperfections, you will grow and become happier.
2. This is normal behavior.
What you think is cheating is often not cheating at all. It's normal developmental behavior.
There is nothing wrong with children painting the walls. They have not yet been taught that coloring only happens on paper. Older children use harsh language in an attempt to develop a very normal and appropriate need for independence.
Once you understand that this is normal behavior, you can move on to effective discipline instead of getting angry. You may want to help the children clean the walls they just painted and explain that the house rule is to only paint on paper.
You can give children and teens the language and space they need to develop independence without being disrespectful.
Ignoring anger and going straight to discipline and education will bring you more happiness.
3.Amount of time.
Children need parental attention. It is very important for their self-esteem and mental health. It gives children a sense of security and lets them know that they are valued and worth their time and attention. The more time you spend with your child, the happier they will be.
Sit down for dinner, stay with her when she gets dressed in the morning, and read her favorite book at bedtime. Your focus will make a huge difference in your life and that of your child.
Giving children the attention they deserve without them acting out for attention will lead to happier families.
4. Enforce bedtimes.
Developing good sleep habits is the real secret to happiness. Many studies tout the importance of bedtime. Regular bedtimes help brain development. Children with consistent bedtimes scored better on reading comprehension, math, and cognitive tests of spatial relationships. Not only that, early to bed and early to rise can also prevent obesity in children.
Families with regular bedtimes are calmer and happier. Running a household becomes easier when adults and children get the rest they need.
5. Stop uptalking.
Ironically, children are happier when parents maintain their authority, limits, and rules. Parents can inadvertently undermine this idea if they ask questions or tell lighthearted stories when talking to their children.
“Please don’t jump on the couch, okay?”
“Can I sleep?”
“Let's go take a bath, okay?”
This gives children the false impression that they are in charge and makes them feel anxious and anxious.
For your own well-being and sanity, and the well-being of your children, your demands need to be firm, resolute, and authoritative.
“The couch is for sitting. You shouldn't jump on it.”
“It's time for bed. It's time for the children to go to bed.”
“It's bath time. We're going to the bathroom now.”
6. Avoid getting into fights.
Children arguing is also a normal behavior that can really upset parents. When children don't want to do chores, they often fight back to get what they want, sometimes because they're bored.
Refuse to interact with children. There are many benefits. Stops cycling through any arguments. It models respectful conversation and calm in the face of anger or disrespect.
When your child argues with you, try these phrases:
“That's an interesting idea…”
“I never thought about that…”
“It looks that way to you, but it doesn't look that way to me…”
“I love you too much to argue…”
“I'm tired of arguing. Let's talk about this later…”
The less you fight, the happier you and your family will be.
7. Be willing to do Jewish things.
Living Jewishly brings meaning, purpose, and vitality to your existence. Increase your involvement in Jewish homes with joy and positivity. Some people are drawn to the intellectual side of Judaism, while others are drawn to a more emotional or spiritual level through song and prayer. Some people love doing acts of kindness. Find out the best ways to help your family connect with their Jewish heritage. This will definitely increase your happiness level.
