Three-fifths of parents with adult children have given their child financial support in the past year, Pew Research reports in a new survey.
The findings show that modern parenting doesn't end when a child turns 18. But supporting adult children can be expensive, financial planners say. And parents need to make sure their financial needs are met.
According to previous Pew research, about half of adults under 30 live with their parents. This number has increased dramatically in recent years.
Americans are marrying later in life and waiting longer to have children. Researchers say these trends point to a new life stage between adolescence and adulthood. Some call it “emerging adulthood.”
'Snowplow' parents pave the economic path for their adult children
In America in 2024, young people face a myriad of economic challenges. College costs and student debt burdens are increasing. Housing prices have soared. Abnormal inflation and interest rates are hurting consumers.
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Parents seem increasingly likely to continue raising their children, removing all obstacles in their path, well beyond the age at which their children graduate from childhood. Some researchers call this “snowplow” parenting.
“Get everything out of the way so your kids can walk down the street perfectly,” said Jonathan Abramowitz, a psychology professor at the University of North Carolina.
Paying your adult children's bills is now easier than ever, whether they live with you or not. In previous generations, bill payments were primarily made by mail. Now everything is done in an app or online.
Pew reports that 28% of adults between the ages of 18 and 34 received financial assistance for household expenses such as groceries and utilities in the past year. 25% received help from their parents with cell phone bills and streaming subscriptions. For rent or mortgage he 17%. 15% is medical expenses. His educational expenses are 11%.
Less than half of adult children report financial independence
Pew reports that fewer than half of young people claim to be completely financially independent from their parents. Even after age 30, a third of adult children still rely on their parents for at least some of the bills.
The Pew study, released Jan. 25, is based on a survey of 4,512 adult children and their parents.
Parental assistance for older children is often relatively minor.
John Maxwell, a St. Louis attorney, is a father of three daughters in his 30s.
Once they got out of school, he effectively said, “You're on your own, kid.” They learned to find work, leave home, and pay their bills.
But not completely. Maxwell's parents still pay for the family's cell phone plan and some streaming services. Every year, my parents pay for the airline tickets and hotels for the family's vacation.
The father lent his eldest daughter money when she was just entering the workforce. “But it wasn't a gift, it was a debt,” he said.
And that's where the Maxwells draw the line.
“It's a tough world out there,” said John Maxwell. “You have to learn to stand on your own two feet.”
For aging parents, helping adult children is “Parenting 101”
For many aging parents, supporting adult children seems to be the essence of parenting.
“We will go to the ends of the earth to make sure our children are safe and happy,” says Christopher Lyman, a certified financial planner in Newtown, Pennsylvania, who advises couples with adult children. ” he said.
Teresa Bailey, a certified financial planner in Nashville, says parents who support adult children see their offspring enter a world different from the one they knew in their youth. He said he is doing so.
“They feel like the economy and the world is different, and it's harder for them to be fully financially independent,” she says.
She says that as long as the parents can afford it, there is no problem with parental assistance. Some aging parents continue to support their adult children at the risk of their own retirement.
“That’s the first thing we check,” she said. “Are you putting yourself in a situation where you have to spend money on your kids and your kids have to spend money on you because you haven’t saved enough for retirement?”
Bailey projects a couple's budget to age 90 and shows them what their financial situation will be based on their savings and spending patterns.
For couples spending a lot of money on adult children, the exercise can be a “lightbulb experience,” she said.
Many parents who support adult children do so to their own financial detriment.
In a new Pew survey, more than one-third of parents who provided financial support to their adult children said doing so hurt their finances.
“Oftentimes, the people providing assistance are not the ones who can afford it,” Lyman said.
For adult children receiving parental assistance, that help can be a blessing or a curse.
In some situations, parental assistance can be a godsend. These include new graduates struggling with student loans and first-time homebuyers who don't have enough money for a down payment.
But experts say this support is bound to end eventually.
“There's a downside to this,” Abramowitz said. Young adults get stuck because their parents protect them, but children never learn how to launch. ”
Parents who support their adult children “deep down have the best intentions,” Abramowitz said.
Still, he said, every once in a while, kids should ask themselves the following questions: “When does that get in the way of a child living their own life?”