It's an unpopular opinion, but as a mother, sometimes you have to choose your career over raising your children. So let's talk about it.
Disclaimer: Please know that we are celebrating female bosses here. This includes girls and women between the ages of 9 and 5 who are taking a non-traditional path to entrepreneurship. But sometimes I think that working mothers should be given flowers in their own way. In today's world, where so much red pill content is centered around telling women who they are and how they should live their lives, it's hard not to think about this idea while fighting to make a name for yourself outside of your family and children. Please speak up to the women who continue to criticize. .
To all those women out there, this is for you.
What we don't talk about enough
Photo credit: Jamel Hope
Evelyn Hambrick and daughters
The speech that has stuck with me is Shonda Rhimes' commencement speech at Dartmouth College in 2014. Therefore, Grey's Anatomy and scandal The creator recalled learning that he can't be everything to everyone, including his own children. “If I'm killing it, scandal I'm writing scripts for work, so I'll probably miss bathing and reading time at home,” Rhimes said. “If I was at home sewing my kids' Halloween costumes, I might blow the script I was supposed to rewrite.” That's the reality of being a mother and a businesswoman. But you don't have to look far to Hollywood for such examples.
Let's also talk about Evelyn Hambrick, a business owner from Huntsville, Alabama. “I have so many moments that I don't want to admit, moments where being an entrepreneur trumps being a mom,” Evelyn tells xoNecole. The mother of two began her entrepreneurial journey during the 2020 pandemic and currently runs four businesses. Evelyn used her “shelter” downtime to learn as much as she could about her passion, photography, she says. As a result, she now owns a commercial property that she operates as a photography studio, as well as owning and operating a day care.
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Evelyn Hambrick
Evelyn was able to accomplish all of this, even though it seemed like she would have to start all over again. “As soon as her husband found out I was pregnant, she left,” she says. “Then I moved in with her sister and her husband. I was actually on bed rest and couldn't work because I had a high-risk pregnancy.” Evelyn credits her girlfriend for getting her back on her feet and keeping her there. I am grateful to the village of After the birth of her second child, Evelyn's immediate family decided to move to Huntsville, where they bought a home together and stayed with each other for nearly a decade until Evelyn moved in in September 2023. We helped each other.
pause the dream
For some working moms, starting over may feel like starting from the bottom, while for others it means ending parenthood and starting anew. Freelancer Radwanya “LD” Roberts can attest to this. She is a wife and mother of three children, and has been working as a reality television producer for nearly 10 years. Like many other working moms, LD Clark decided early in her motherhood journey to become a stay-at-home mom until her children were old enough to be independent. I have decided to do so. For LD, it also meant putting her production dreams on hold.
But now, LD's eldest son is a freshman in college, which means new doors could open for her. “When my kids were little, I didn't take a job out of state because I didn't want to be away from them,” she says. “But now that they're older, we can do that. And now we have FaceTime, thank God!” I commend them for providing me with a much-needed support system.
“My husband is a good father and someone I can trust,” says LD. “I know he's going to make sure the kids have dinner and dinner. He's never complained. He's a man's man and he takes care of the bills. Ta.”
Moments when working moms feel embarrassed
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LR: Radwanya “LD” Roberts and daughters
Although balanced parent households should be the norm for all children, we all know that for many people that is not the reality. Evelyn said her own co-parenting experience was not what she expected, and especially did not reflect the co-parenting dynamics she grew up with. “They had a perfect trade-off. Instead of having her mother quit her job, her father took over her job,” says Evelyn. She added: “It wasn't until I was an adult that I found out they didn't like each other, but I had no idea.” Evelyn respects her parents for giving her a safe environment that was not full of drama because they respected each other.
Not much has changed today. Evelyn's parents are equally passionate about their grandchildren's lives. She is grateful that her parents are there for her, even when they can't be. “Her parents don't miss the fact that I'm a busy entrepreneur.” Evelyn even recalls a day when she didn't know her daughter was sick at school. Evelyn was shocked when she learned what happened next. “Even though I said I was free, her mother came to pick me up,” she says. “She said her child said, 'I told the nurse not to call me because I know you're busy and working,'” Evelyn continues. I was free that day, but she didn't know it. I was going to surprise them when they came home from school. The fact that she had to tell someone outside of our family bothers me. ”
Photo credit: Ramseys Rivas
Radwanya “LD” Roberts
Yes, working mothers miss out on many important moments, but unfortunately, so do their children. But both LD and Evelyn always try to make sure their kids know: why. For LD, “They understand that things cost money and life costs money. We have a house, we have food, we have things we want, (but) mom and dad have jobs. They're never upset that I have to work. They (just) wish it wouldn't be this long.”
As for Evelyn's children, she says her older child has always said he wants to be a photographer like her and have his own business. As for her youngest child, she says, “My 4-year-old has been with her mother since she was born. It just means it's gone. A day later, she told me she was ready to go back to GG.'' Evelyn regularly tells her daughters that she will shut everything down if necessary. I will tell you that there is.
There's light at the end of the tunnel
These hard-working mothers continue to work hard to model to their children that pursuing your dreams and passions is important. LD is currently aiming to become a casting director and is working as her assistant in casting, which has always been her passion. she says: “I realized that life is short, so I want to go after what I want.” Her advice to working moms: “The most important thing you can do is read the words, keep your feet on the ground.” Be yourself, whatever you believe in, do it.”
Evelyn thinks it's a good idea to involve children in her activities. Her advice to moms who are entrepreneurs: If she quits too soon, she will miss out on her blessings. wait a minute. The biggest mistake you can make is deciding for yourself when it will happen. You can give yourself goals (but). ”
Feature image by MoMo Productions/Getty Images