- I used to judge “iPad parents.” We now understand that technology can be a valuable parenting tool.
- However, giving children unfettered access is also problematic.
- Everyone gets frustrated when accessing content without understanding how technology works.
I admit it. I used to criticize “iPad parents.”
When I first became a father to a very well-behaved girl, I used to scoff at parents who used cartoons to entertain their children at restaurants. Don't they know how easy it is to pull out a coloring book for your child and enjoy a meal in peace?They didn't know you could actually do it engage Rather than ignoring your children? Why would they rot a young child's brain with lazy screen time shortcuts?!
I'm not that father anymore.
A few years later, my daughter, now 3 years old, came along. Now, mealtime is no longer a picturesque moment of togetherness. Those are wars. Getting even a morsel of food involves high-stakes negotiations, sometimes blackmailing her and begging to keep her in her seat. They throw tantrums, throw things, and shed tears.
So now I understand. Sometimes you just need a break. And often, showing your child their favorite show is the only way to get them to sit still. It may be the only time you can catch your breath and eat your own food. That day may be your only chance to look your spouse in the eye or take a shower.
I realized that screen time and other technology can be a great tool for exhausted parents. But at the same time, for me, it's starting to become more of a problem than it's worth.
On-demand access isn't always better
It's amazing to have instant, on-demand access to the music and children's programming you want. But in my eyes, too much access is officially a problem.
I'm sure I'm not the only one who has experienced the following scenario.
I drive my kids to school in the morning. My youngest son yelled from the backseat that he wanted to hear a Peppa Pig story. Via Spotify he turns one on and off he goes. “Not this!” Okay, that's cool. Skip to next. There's also a handy button on the steering wheel that lets you ask Siri.
“No!” she insists. I haven't found a story that suits her yet. “Which one do you want?” she asks. “I lost my key!” What? “I lost my keys!” I only vaguely know what she's talking about. There's an episode where Daddy Pig loses his car keys, and I can't for the life of me remember what they're called. “SIRI,” she shouted over my head. “Play without your key!”
Siri begins playing a heavy metal song that is esoteric and profane. You will have to start this process over again.
YouTube is worse. There are ads you have to skip and pop-ups you have to close. A cavalcade of relevant videos that you'll need to keep an eye on lest the rabbit hole get too weird.
Some of the other platforms we pay for at least don't have commercials. But they also give kids options the moment they log in, with colorful thumbnails of unicorns and cartoon animals popping up everywhere. All options lead to indecision paralysis or buyer's remorse once chosen. So I have to stand up and help change to the next option. different Show me the moment you settled into another job.
I felt it was easier to have fewer options.
Even just a few years ago, when my oldest son was little, things seemed simpler.
Streaming existed, but it wasn't as popular. She was happy just watching “Frozen” on DVD over and over again. There wasn't much jumping around. We didn't have to judge the running time that much.
It was the perfect time to finish cooking, prepare dinner, or just sit around while watching a Disney movie.
And I don't want to start a “when I was a kid” thing, but my brother and I used to be able to get my dad to turn off NPR and switch to regular radio on long car rides. Suffice it to say, I was happy. I didn't have Spotify or in-car Netflix, so I didn't know what I was missing.
I don't know which generation is better.
We love what we hear and see, but we wish we had foreseen these issues
Seriously, there are more great kids' shows out there than ever before. And it has become increasingly accessible.
I'm actually excited about “Peppa Pig.” I love “Bluey”. And it's so much fun listening to random silly nursery rhymes that come through Spotify. I'm lucky that I'm not tied down to anime that just happen to be on network TV on Saturday mornings.
I wish we had foreseen the problems that could arise from entrusting unfettered access to everything to wayward children. In the case of our little one, we could have refrained from introducing her to the never-ending short-form content machine. Maybe you haven't told her about the magic of her “skip” button.