Dear Deirdre: When my ex-husband and I broke up, I believed in his promise to co-parent our children, but after six months we've had nothing but problems.
All I want is for my sons to have a current father, but he is doing everything he can to make that impossible.
I'm 34 years old, my ex-boyfriend is 36, and we were together for 6 years. We have two young sons, one he is 4 years old and the other he is 7 years old.
It would be an understatement to say that our marriage was turbulent. We had a hard time agreeing on anything. From children's bedtimes to discipline, and even how they spend their holidays.
In the end we decided to end things.
Although we didn't get along, I never had any doubts about him as a father.
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But since we broke up, he has become someone I don't recognize. He is negative, insensitive, and mean.
He didn't come to see them too often, but somehow always found a way to take it out on me.
He doesn't hesitate to say bad things about me, so the kids often come home upset and confused.
Every time I try to discuss it with him he gets angry and starts arguing.
Now he is threatening to cut off all financial support unless I give him full custody.
I'm at a loss and am starting to wonder if I'm better off without him.
Deirdre says: He may think he can withhold child support to get what he wants, but in reality, parents have no legal obligation to support their children, regardless of whether they exist or not. have a certain responsibility.
Withholding child support is also a common form of financial abuse that occurs after a relationship ends.
Getting legal advice may put your mind at ease. Contact Citizens Advice (www.citizensadvice.org.uk).
Women's Rights can also discuss this with you (rightsofwomen.org. uk, 020 7251 6577).
To help your child navigate their feelings during this time, we'll send you our support pack, “When Parents Have a Difference.''
