Imagine the birth of a baby. As soon as you open your eyes, you find yourself staring into the camera. When you get home, you will find that the temperature in your bedroom is perfectly adjusted to your requirements. The water in the bath is neither too hot nor too cold. Baby bottles are sterilized and warmed for optimal comfort, and when sleeping in their own room, parents are comforted by the gentle rise and fall of their breasts visible through the baby monitor. If one of the parents has to go out for a bit, they can log in to the nanny camera installed at home from their mobile phone and see the precious little faces they miss so much.
There is no denying that all this comes from love. Hygiene, comfort and continuous monitoring. There is also a silver lining for parents, with stay-at-home parents freeing up their hands to relax or finish work for at least a few hours a day, and working parents feeling more confident about their workday. You can go back. Their little one is safe and comfortable.
From bottle sterilizers to baby monitors to nanny cameras, we can't ignore the fact that technology has made parents' lives so much easier. But in an age where innovation is so pervasive, when is it time to step back and say “enough is enough”?
the vileness of technology
When Taneem, a mother of a 6-month-old, was about to return to work after maternity leave, Nanny Cam was the only thing that helped her through the painful transition.
“I needed to feel in control. Being away from my daughter for this long seemed impossible at first. Whenever I felt down, I would log in to see my daughter and immediately Nanny Cam was a boon in the sense that I was able to feel better “relax more!'' ” she says.
The above may paint a rosy picture in your brain, but the technology is stealthy in terms of satisfying users. Parents need downtime, but relying too much on baby monitors and electronic rockers can deprive babies of touch and physical intimacy, one of the most precious gifts parents can give their babies. there is.
According to Farhat Hasan, child counselor at BetterHelp, each child goes through different stages of development as they grow up, and each child has unique needs that must be met.
“Children begin developing their brains as soon as they get a heartbeat. Therefore, parents need to educate their children about their developmental stages even before they are born. The sooner they make the necessary lifestyle changes from the beginning, the better I’m ready.’ Give your child what they need to stimulate their brain,” Hasan says.
Previously, grandparents, uncles, and aunts lived under one roof, and the entire family was responsible for the child's upbringing. Now, due to changes in family relationships, her choice of assistance in raising children has narrowed down to two options: domestic help or technology.
“It's a matter of choosing the lesser of two evils, and technology has an advantage over domestic help. But this is by no means an ideal environment for children to grow up in,” Farhat Hasan warned. do.
Leverage technology
Hasan warns parents that children are at risk of developing social anxiety, especially if they are left unsupervised with their devices for long periods of time. “Children must be given the power to interact naturally with humans. Otherwise they will avoid interactions every time. This will always set them back and stunt their growth. It will be.”
On the other hand, strict no-screen policies imposed by parents are equally unrealistic. As children grow up, they are exposed to technology at school and in other people's homes.
“This is modern times. You can't escape the screen,” Hasan says.
“Taking kids away from screens completely can actually create an inferiority complex in them.” recommended. “This type of interaction reduces a child's social anxiety as they grow older,” says the counselor.
In Bangladesh, using screens during meals is a common scenario in households with small children. “My son is three years old,” says Seher Chaudhry, a housewife. “For the past two years, I've had a hard time getting him to eat vegetables, but ever since I turned on the screen, mealtimes have become easier. Vegetables, fruit, anything when he's distracted. You can eat it.”
Nutrition is undoubtedly one of the most important requirements for children, but will this insidious approach do more harm than good?
It's not wrong for parents to want their children to eat vegetables, but it's better to understand that sneaking food into your children can cause them to develop an unhealthy relationship with food. Not only that, but you're also skipping important developmental stages for your child.
“Parents should never force their child to eat more than a certain amount. When a child learns to hold a fork and spoon, they become independent and confident. Let's mix things up. Apply different techniques each time you approach food. “This is natural learning, but if your child is focused on the screen instead of eating, they can quickly lose momentum.” Yes,” says Hasan.
Screening time
Most parents worry about how much time their children spend on screens, wonder how much of their lives they share with strangers, and lose sleep over cyberbullying and other world wide web mysteries. Because of this, we don't want our children to navigate it alone.
Parents often use technology as a privilege, taking it beyond a certain amount of time, setting timers, or introducing cell phones to limit their children's screen time. But not many take an introspective look to see if their children's unhealthy obsession with gadgets has anything to do with how they use their own devices.
Children often want uninterrupted time and conversation with their parents. What they get is a better-than-nothing alternative in the form of communication disruptions interrupted by regular pings and alerts from their phones. When they see their parents paying attention to these things during a conversation, they are discouraged from repeating the interaction and turn to the internet for the connection they didn't get from their parents.
A study published in the Journal of Developmental and Behavioral Pediatrics found that excessive use of technology by parents not only deprives families of valuable learning opportunities, but can also cause conflict and tension within the family. got it. The proliferation of electronic devices has blurred the line between work and personal time, disrupting family life, especially for families with children.
balance of body and spirit
For children of all ages, a frightening byproduct of overexposure to technology is the imbalance of mental and physical stimulation it causes.
“Screen time prevents children from the physical outlet they need to grow stronger and smarter. This automatically creates an environment that fosters stress and anxiety in young children.” Better Farhat Hasan, a child counselor at HELP, says:
Counselors felt strongly that a holistic approach needed to be taken to provide the balance of physical and emotional outlets that children should receive for optimal growth and development. “Seven-year-olds who do their own household chores don't have screen time. Children who live with or near their grandparents are also constantly interacting with people of different ages and are more active.” , I don’t have time for screens.”
Especially in Dhaka, where there is a distinct lack of green space, parents struggle to find ways for their children to release energy, have positive learning experiences, and find physical pathways to tire out their little bodies. This is an issue because of the
“Dance!” Hasan says. “Kids love dancing, so you can throw a short 30-minute dance party together.” Experts say creating moments like this gives kids more than just a physical outlet. It is said that it will provide. “They get one-on-one time with their parents, their confidence levels are strengthened, they sleep better, their eating habits mature and their gut health improves. It's a gift that keeps on giving.”
Preteens and their battle with privacy
The problem with screens, especially portable screens, is that they draw you in. On the other hand, screens are so ubiquitous that it's hard to look away. Ever since schools fully introduced the concept of online classes due to the novel coronavirus disease (COVID-19), children in sensitive age groups such as pre-teens have been exposed to these devices for extended periods of time. I had to put it in. This has made us more dependent on screens than ever before.
“My daughter wants privacy and I want to respect that,” says Namera Kabir, mother of a 13-year-old. “But I don't want to imagine what kind of evil she's exposing herself to. She carelessly brushes off my concerns, and she doesn't just talk about my concerns. I wish I could.”
Pre-teens and teenagers generally understand what is good and bad content, but what they struggle with is information overload. There is a lot of information on the internet, but not all of it is good or even relevant. “The role of parents is important here. Trying to start a conversation with your children without prying or even criticizing is a skill you must master to connect with children this age.” The more comfortable your presence makes children feel, the more they will be open about their experiences, including with technology,'' Hasan says.
Children learn to compare from an early age and begin to develop their own complexes. Teens and pre-teens feel these pressures more often due to hormonal development and major personality changes. The pretend world of social media and influencers is adding fuel to the fire.
“It's up to parents to replenish their emotional bank balances. Give back what technology threatens to take away,” advises Farhat Hasan.
“Experience new experiences with your children, teach them skills, and give them the confidence to master them on a regular basis. become less dependent on harmful technologies,” she concludes. .
Photo: Sazad Ibne Said Illustration: LS
