How many times have you threatened a child who won't listen to you? Maybe it was bedtime and you said, “I'm not going to read if I don't brush my teeth!” Or when it was time to leave the park, you shouted, “If you keep running away from me, we'll never come back to the park!”
If you are thinking, yes it looks like me,please do not worry. We've all been there.Parenting is hard enough even when we have kids do Listen, our patience can wear thin (especially at the end of the day). However, there are ways to convey the same message without using negative connotations. It is a reframing that turns a threat into a positive outcome.
Positive Parenting Instagrammer Ralphie (@simplyonPurpose) shared this concept of healthy parenting habits to develop in 2024 in a viral reel.
“It's only natural for parents to use the threat of taking things away to motivate them,” she admits in Reel, explaining why using positive outcomes can benefit children. did. “Using positive outcomes enriches a child’s life and creates positive connections with their behavior and parents.”
So what does that look like in practice? Ralphie used a flip example: “If you don't let go, we're leaving!” “If you don't let go, we can stay and play.”
These two phrases mean the same thing, but your child hears them when they interpret it as a positive outcome. can what to do on their behalf Can not do. By encouraging good behavior rather than condemning bad behavior, your child will feel safe and connected to you as a parent and will be more likely to listen.
Of course, it's all theoretical. intention Listen, flip the script like this. In the scenario used by Ralphie, the consequence of not being able to keep one's hands to oneself is to leave. And it's okay if that happens as a result!
People often mistake gentle parenting for permissive parenting, but that is not the case. Still, you can be a solid leader, setting clear boundaries and showing compassion and empathy for your children. It doesn't have to be one or the other. In this case, you can say to the child: “I know you.” Really I want to stay and play. I'm not going to let you hit me. We're going home now, and it's okay to be upset about it. I'm here for you. ”