child rearing
TikTokers like Paige Turner, a mother of four, believe Mother's Day should celebrate mothers who are actively co-parenting with their children at home.
tiktok/@sheisapaigetturner
Who is celebrated on Mother's Day?
The answer may seem obvious, but some matriarchs aren't so keen on sharing their special day.
“Today is Mother's Day, not Grandmother's Day,” Emily Wenner, an Indianapolis family photographer, said in a TikTok video that garnered 2.3 million views and sparked controversy last week.
The mother-of-two points out that her own mother agrees with her theory, and that she spent one Mother's Day planning a visit to her grandparents on the day she was supposed to be celebrating. I remembered.
“I couldn't do anything for myself, so I was like, 'I'm never going to do this again,'” she said in the video.
She continued that her family celebrates her grandmother on different days of the year, and the tradition is the same for Father's Day.
“Some people may be uncomfortable hearing this, but that's what I want to do,” she said. “I'm the one who created the boundaries and now I'm the one who's obsessed with parenting, so I'm going to spend my day the way I want.”
And it ruffled feathers and sparked a heated debate in the comments about the best way to celebrate mothers in life.
“You selfish women want your husband to forget about his mother. You can't wait until your kids are grown and do the same to you,” one user accused Wehner of .
“I'm honestly shocked that more and more people don't celebrate Mother's Day or Father's Day just by getting the extended family together and celebrating all the mothers and fathers together,” said another. “There's enough love for everyone!”
“I was upset that I spent time with my husband's mother on Mother's Day. But now both of our mothers have passed away, and I'm glad we were able to celebrate them in any way we could.” ” wrote someone offering a different perspective. “We have to remember that we are here because of them.”
But Wehner wasn't the only mom wanting to shine a spotlight on the holidays.
On TikTok, fellow moms argued that this special day should be reserved for “moms in the trenches” — moms who are home raising their kids and have trouble sleeping at night.
Texan mother Amy Hayden posted her own video explaining why older people celebrate Grandparents Day in September instead.
“We all had mothers to get us here, you know that,” she began the clip, which has been viewed more than 42,000 times. “But once the kids have babies, it's Mother's Day.”
She argued that women should not feel obligated to see their grandmother or mother-in-law on special days. While older mothers may still expect or receive gifts, Hayden believes Mother's Day is really for mothers who “still have kids at home.”
“If you don't have small children at home and you're not actively raising your children by getting up, taking the baby to work, getting them dressed for school, then Mother's Day has passed. ” Hayden continued in the caption. Her Grandparents Day is on September 8th for her, so “make a note of it on your calendar.”
Viewers were divided, but they were shocked by Hayden's views, saying they were “wrong” and saying they would never stop praising the mothers who came before them.
“Once a mother, always a mother,” one person wrote.
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